Ted Lasso is an endearing, charming, and humorous character from the hit Apple TV+ show with the same name.
Ted Lasso has gained immense popularity around the world for his inspiringly positive mindset and innocently funny jokes.
Through his personality, Ted Lasso has become a symbol of hope, optimism, and determination. This football coach with a soccer team is sure to lift your spirits today with his words.
In this blog post, we’ll highlight some of the best Ted Lasso quotes and explore why people love this character so much.
So, let’s dive into Ted’s timeless charm and bring a bright spot to our day with these iconic Ted Lasso quotes!
Ted Lasso Quotes
“And finally, “You say impossible, but all I hear is ‘I’m possible.'”
― Ted Lasso
“If God wanted games to end in a tie, She wouldn’t have invented numbers, all right?”
― Ted Lasso
“The idea behind every trick play is to have chaos rain down upon your opponents and stun them. Much like the lava did to those poor folks in Pompeii.”
― Ted Lasso
“That’s a special young man right there. Got talent for days, works hard, and he’s got a jawline like the White Cliffs of Dover. I’m always rootin’ for him.”
― Ted Lasso
“So I’ve been hearing this phrase y’all got over here that I ain’t too crazy about. ‘It’s the hope that kills you.’ Y’all know that? I disagree you know? I think it’s the lack of hope that comes and gets you. See, I believe in hope. I believe in belief.”
― Ted Lasso
“There’s two buttons I never like to hit, alright? And that’s ‘panic’ and ‘snooze.'”
― Ted Lasso
“It’s funny to think about the things in your life that can make you cry just knowing that they existed, can then become the same thing that make you cry knowing that they’re now gone.”
― Ted Lasso
“I haven’t seen someone that disappointed to see me since I wore a red baseball cap to a Planned Parenthood fundraiser.”
― Ted Lasso
“Hey, you two are like Frank Sinatra and Ava Gardner, you know? Or, uh, Frank Sinatra and Mia Farrow. Or Frank and… Actually, you know what? I’m starting to realize that Ol’ Blue Eyes might’ve skewed mercurial.”
― Ted Lasso
“There’s a bunch of crazy stuff on Twitter. Heck, someone made an account for my mustache.”
― Ted Lasso
“I’ve never met someone who doesn’t eat sugar. Only heard about ’em, and they all live in this godless place called Santa Monica.”
― Ted Lasso
“Doing the right thing is never the wrong thing.”
― Ted Lasso
“I shouldn’t bring an umbrella to a brainstorm.”
― Ted Lasso
“On Roy’s excessive swearing: “It’s kinda like all the nipples in that movie Showgirls. Halfway through, you don’t even notice. You just kinda get sucked into the narrative.”
― Ted Lasso
“You are more mysterious than David Blaine reading a Sue Grafton novel at Area 51.”
― Ted Lasso
“Boy, I love meeting people’s moms. It’s like reading an instruction manual as to why they’re nuts.”
― Ted Lasso
“Great party game, horrible relationship status.”
― Ted Lasso
“Like I always say, sometimes the best stew is the one you leave sitting on the stove overnight ’cause you fell asleep watching Citizen Kane after too many beers.”
― Ted Lasso
Ted Lasso Sayings
“You’re telling me I could shatter every bone in my body, someone could just drop me off in front of any old hospital, dumped into a garbage can or something, and y’all patch me up, and I don’t have to pay jack squat? I tell you, I love this country.”
― Ted Lasso
“I think that if you care about someone and you got a little love in your heart, there ain’t nothing you can’t get through together.”
― Ted Lasso
“All right, fellas, you gotta remember, your body is like day-old rice. If it ain’t warmed up properly, something real bad could happen.”
― Ted Lasso
“We all know speed is important. But being able to stop and change directions quickly? Well, that’s like Kanye’s 808s & Heartbreak. It don’t get nearly enough credit.”
― Ted Lasso
“Ice cream’s the best. It’s kinda like seeing Billy Joel live. Never disappoints.”
― Ted Lasso
“You beating yourself up is like Woody Allen playing the clarinet. I don’t wanna hear it. All right?”
― Ted Lasso
“Our goal is to go out like Willie Nelson, on a high.”
― Ted Lasso
“Divorce is hard. It doesn’t matter if you’re the one leaving or if…you’re the one who got left. It makes folks do crazy things.”
― Ted Lasso
“You should do a TED Talk, ’cause right now you’re getting a whole heap of ‘Ted listen.'”
― Ted Lasso
“It’s just a group of people who care, Roy. Not unlike folks at a hip-hop concert whose hands are not in the air.”
― Ted Lasso
“Sounds to me like someone’s trapped inside life’s most complicated shape: a love triangle. Second place of course is the ‘I just walked in on my mother-in-law changing into her swimsuit’ dodecahedron.”
― Ted Lasso
“Well, as my doctor told me when I got addicted to fettuccine Alfredo, that’s a little rich for my blood.”
― Ted Lasso
“Guys have underestimated me my entire life. And for years, I never understood why. It used to really bother me. But then one day, I was driving my little boy to school, and I saw this quote by Walt Whitman, and it was painted on the wall there. It said, ‘Be curious, not judgmental.’ I like that.”
― Ted Lasso
“What I can tell you is that with the exception of the wit and wisdom of Calvin and Hobbes, not much lasts forever.”
― Ted Lasso
“I think one of the neatest things about being a coach is the connection you get to make with your players. That’s a loss that hits me a lot harder and is gonna stay with me a lot longer than anything that happens while playing a game on a patch of grass.”
― Ted Lasso
“Here’s an idea that’s gonna help a little or hurt a whole lot. Who needs a drink?”
― Ted Lasso
“For me, success is not about the wins and losses. It’s about helping these young fellas be the best versions of themselves on and off the field.”
― Ted Lasso
“If I didn’t have any confidence, I never would’ve worn pajamas to my prom and ended up in jail the rest of that night.”
― Ted Lasso
“I think I literally have a better understanding of who killed Kennedy than what is offside… It was the mob.”
― Ted Lasso
Funny Ted Lasso Quotes
“I come bearing sweet treats to numb the sting of defeat.”
― Ted Lasso
“Jamie, I think that you might be so sure that you’re one in a million, that sometimes you forget that out there, you’re just 1 of 11. And if you just figure out someway to turn that ‘me’ into ‘us’…the sky’s the limit for you.”
― Ted Lasso
“You know what the happiest animal on Earth is? It’s a goldfish. Y’know why? It’s got a 10-second memory. Be a goldfish.”
― Ted Lasso
“If the internet has taught us anything, it’s that sometimes it’s easier to speak our minds anonymously.”
― Ted Lasso
“I’m not sure what y’all’s smallest unit of measurement is here, but that’s about how much headway I made.”
― Ted Lasso
“She’s got some fences, alright, but you just gotta hop over ’em.”
― Ted Lasso
On whether or not he believes in ghosts: “I do. But more importantly, I think they need to believe in themselves. You know?”
― Ted Lasso
“Back where I’m from, you try to end a game in a tie; well, that might as well be the first sign of the apocalypse.”
― Ted Lasso
“I do love a locker room. It smells like potential.”
― Ted Lasso
“You got Ronaldo and the fellow who bends it like himself.”
― Ted Lasso
“We’re gonna call this drill ‘The Exorcist’ ’cause it’s all about controlling possession.”
― Ted Lasso
“If that’s a joke, I love it. If not, can’t wait to unpack that with you later.”
― Ted Lasso
“Look at it out there. It looks like a Renaissance painting portraying masculine melancholy.”
― Ted Lasso
“I believe in Communism. Rom-communism, that is. If Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan can go through some heartfelt struggles and still end up happy, then so can we.”
― Ted Lasso
“I’ve never been embarrassed about having streaks in my drawers. You know, it’s all part of growing up.”
― Ted Lasso
“Taking on a challenge is a lot like riding a horse, isn’t it? If you’re comfortable while you’re doing it, you’re probably doing it wrong.”
― Ted Lasso
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